Indian Parenting: Top 7 Mistakes That Parents Should Avoid

When I became a father to a beautiful baby in 2021 I was over the moon. Fatherhood/ parenthood was new to me. Me & my wife struggled during the initial years. We made several mistakes during those initial years. I wish there was somebody who could guide us in our parenting journey & help us avoid mistakes.  Here is a list of mistakes that modern Indian parents make & how you can avoid making them.

1. Unable To Connect With My Baby

Millennials are the first generation where fathers are spending time with their babies. As per a study, Indian fathers today spend 3X more time with their kids as compared to their fathers. As I had no training to be a father I struggled to connect with my baby. I just did not know what to do. I got bored with my baby after spending just 10-15mins with him. This did not go well with the wife who was obviously furious over having to take up major part of the load of caring for our baby. I kept telling myself that I was the secondary caregiver & that I just needed to be a good assistant to my wife. This led to my baby being distant from me & always asking for his mother. That's when I decided to build a relationship with my child & truly help my wife.

I started by talking to my baby in a way that he really liked - creating games that interested him. You can start with buying sock puppets or just creating sock puppets from your torn socks. Just draw a pair of black eyes over your torn white socks & voila you have a sock puppet. I named it "socky the snake". I wore the sock puppet on my right hand & started conversing with my kid via the sock puppet. My kid loved it & I suddenly became popular. Toys, drawing books, etc. are very helpful. I gladly become a horse for my child on our bed before putting him to sleep

2. Not Buying Enough Toys

Toys are a great way to keep your baby occupied. It helps in your kids improving your kids grasping power & learning abilities as well. Look for popular toys & buy as much as you can. If finances are an issue then buy 1-2 toys every month. Your child will keep getting bored of the old ones & you need to keep replacing them. I assure you that it will be money well spent.

3. Screen Time

Too much of anything is bad as the old adage goes. This holds true for screen time as well. While one shouldn't let their kids watch too many cartoons, especially in the 1st year one should restrict it completely either. Putting on some cartoons while feeding your kid (30mins during lunch & 30mins during dinner is acceptable). As per some studies, some cartoons like Cocomelon have been proven to be harmful. Please avoid showing them to your kids.

4.  Relying Too Much On Your Nanny

While not many parents in first-world countries can afford nannies or full time maids, nannies or maids are a mainstay in Indian households. But having a nanny or a maid doesn't mean you can stop caring for your baby. For nannies, your kid is just a job & a means to pay their bills. They will not care for your kid the way you will. Keep a close eye on your nanny. As most maids are not well versed in English, they will end up communicating with your kid in their native language. It becomes imperative that you communicate with your kid regularly, especially if you want your kid to pick up English quickly. 

5. Making Your Kid Join School Too Soon

One mistake we made was to put our kid to school too soon. We made our kid join Radiant Minds -  a preschool after he was around 2 years old. Our kid loved Radiant Minds & the teachers there too were helpful. But just a year later we put him in St. Gregorios pre-nursery. It's a good school, but the timings are an issue for us. Our 3 year old has to wake up at 7 AM every weekday & we hate it for ruining his sleep. Radiant Minds preschool had a much more relaxed schedule - it started at 12PM. That used to let our kid complete his quota of sleep. We could have made our kid join school next year & let him continue in Radiant Minds for another year where he would have a relaxed schedule, but we gave in to peer pressure. Please avoid this mistake. Your kid can easily join a school directly from nursery (Jr. KG).

6. Traveling

Traveling with your infant before they turn 3 is a big NO in our book. We tried taking small vacations with our baby before he turned 3 & it never felt like a vacation. We spent most of our time tending to our kid who felt uneasy in unfamiliar surroundings. Some friends of ours, vacationed abroad with their 1 year-old baby & repented it. While looking at pics of your friends vacationing abroad will give major FOMO, we would recommend you not to take your baby on your trip abroad before he/she turns 3. Even after turning 3, we would recommend you take either of your parents along. Take a lot of toys & drawing books to keep your kid occupied. Please try to avoid destinations that involve long-duration flights - this will put a lot of strain on your baby who will act out.

7. Not Consulting A Paediatrician

Many Indian parents either don't consult a doctor at all or make the mistake of consulting the family physician. Pediatricians are the experts when It comes to childcare. We would strongly recommend you consult a pediatrician for your kid's medical needs. Keep a close track of his vaccine shots.

We hope that you found this article informative & helps you in your parenting journey. We would love to hear from you. Please drop a mail to info@theopinionatedindian.com or WhatsApp us on 91-7710076367 for any queries or to share your parenting related issues.